When You're Offended

Saturday, February 06, 2021

At some point, each of us have been hurt by something someone has said. I can think of instances when someone has said something to me that has offended me. When that has happened, my natural tendancy is to not address it, letting it fester inside of me. It then allows Satan to work on me and believing lies. 

How do you handle when someone has offended you? Do you do like me or do you go after the offender with anger? Neither way is honoring God and doing the right thing. We are called to address the situation. It will help us heal our wound and show grace to the person who hurt us. Paul wrote this in his letter to the Hebrews

Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord. Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting man. (Hebrews 12:14-15)

I found a helpful article from Mark Merrill with tips on how to resolve the situation- 10 Ways To Respond When You've Benn Offended. A few quick points-

  • Be Cautious- if you need to address the person, think it through first so you can respond in a gentle way
  • Be calm and address the person with a peacemaking attitude
  • Don't rush to judgement. Share your side, but be open to listen to the other side. Use "I" statements (ie.- I felt hurt when you siad...) instead of "you" statements (You hurt me when...)
  • Ask questions- seek to understand the other person
  • Offer grace, and show appreciation to them for sitting with you to talk it through.


The end goal is to help you heal and mend the relationship. Pray that God opens your heart to give you the words and actions to be able to achieve that peace He wants for your life!



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